Bismillah..
It's been awhile.
Actually, I experienced writers blocked. Its scary. I've been through this tough time for the past.. i dont know.. 3 years. And it depressed me. To not be able to write, although i feel like one. To not be able to express, when I have tons of emotions to let out.
I am sad. Scared. And honestly... dying.
I have never been this scared. I wish I can turn back time. I wish life was as easy when I was young.
Living freely was my aim. And that's what I strived for, before.
Never thought that I made a decision that will forever change my life. And i am still in a stage to adapt but finding to a dark and blank point where I feel like giving up.
Life is hard. I find it hard to adjust me in my life now. Get it?
I know you don't.
But my heart ache... everytime I think what can I possibly do in order to get my life back.
My heart ache... everytime I think about the past more than I think about the future now.
My heart ache.. more than everything i could think of that can possibly hurt me.
My heart ache.. so bad.. I feel like crying.
I miss me, my vitamin S.
Write again soon, inshaAllah.
Syafika L.
Friday, 30 June 2017
Wednesday, 5 April 2017
Bismillah..
It's been awhile, but you know what... I'M MARRIEDDD!!!!!
Banyak benda jadi while I plan the wedding.
Will get into details on my next post... if I have time lah.
But as for now,
I just want to share with you guys that I am officially someone's wife.
A Mrs. for God Sake!! OMG!
Surreal, everything is just surreal.
Till then,
MRS. FL (SL saja gediks 👯)
TR's HQ 6th April 20172.15pm
Tuesday, 10 January 2017
Patah.
Bismillah.
You know, the struggle of being in love is hard.
and the struggle when you broke up is even harder.
Kau rasa kau ada needs to prove to everyone yang you're the good person in the relationship,
it's not you who makes this mess all over again, dan kau rasa takut gila sebab kau rasa semua orang
perhati kau dan label kau, lagi-lagi bila you're somebody.
Aku kena harungi benda tu juga.
Waktu aku broke up dulu, aku rasa aku ada needs to let everyone knows that it's not my fault alone.
That guy makes mistakes too. I mean, ,come on, who doesnt, right?
Dan setelah aku berusaha utk clarify kat semua orang, aku jadi letih. Sama macam letihnya aku lari
setiap kali aku putus cinta dulu. Dia mcm lari yang takde penghujung dan buat kau rasa kalau kau stay kat satu tempat kau tak safe anymore.
So aku stop jadi this psycho girl, yang rasa the needs to clarify to everyone apa aku buat for the relationship etc. Aku stop. Dan aku pilih untuk diam.
And as time goes by, aku masih rasa sakit bila aku dengar orang cakap aku lah yang jahat tu, aku lah
yang buat relationship tu tak jadi.
But you know what, this time around aku tak nak clarify, and aku bukan tulis blog ni sebab aku nak beritahu semua apa jadi, tapi aku jak beritahu pada semua yang mengalami masalah macam aku ;
" Silence is gold "
Let them talk. You just do your job and prove that you worth more than what they think you are.
Enjoy life. Travel more. And be happy.
Mana tahu jodoh korang yang betul ada dekat tepi?
Catat lagi nanti,
SL
You know, the struggle of being in love is hard.
and the struggle when you broke up is even harder.
Kau rasa kau ada needs to prove to everyone yang you're the good person in the relationship,
it's not you who makes this mess all over again, dan kau rasa takut gila sebab kau rasa semua orang
perhati kau dan label kau, lagi-lagi bila you're somebody.
Aku kena harungi benda tu juga.
Waktu aku broke up dulu, aku rasa aku ada needs to let everyone knows that it's not my fault alone.
That guy makes mistakes too. I mean, ,come on, who doesnt, right?
Dan setelah aku berusaha utk clarify kat semua orang, aku jadi letih. Sama macam letihnya aku lari
setiap kali aku putus cinta dulu. Dia mcm lari yang takde penghujung dan buat kau rasa kalau kau stay kat satu tempat kau tak safe anymore.
So aku stop jadi this psycho girl, yang rasa the needs to clarify to everyone apa aku buat for the relationship etc. Aku stop. Dan aku pilih untuk diam.
And as time goes by, aku masih rasa sakit bila aku dengar orang cakap aku lah yang jahat tu, aku lah
yang buat relationship tu tak jadi.
But you know what, this time around aku tak nak clarify, and aku bukan tulis blog ni sebab aku nak beritahu semua apa jadi, tapi aku jak beritahu pada semua yang mengalami masalah macam aku ;
" Silence is gold "
Let them talk. You just do your job and prove that you worth more than what they think you are.
Enjoy life. Travel more. And be happy.
Mana tahu jodoh korang yang betul ada dekat tepi?
Catat lagi nanti,
SL
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