Bismillah..
It's been awhile.
Actually, I experienced writers blocked. Its scary. I've been through this tough time for the past.. i dont know.. 3 years. And it depressed me. To not be able to write, although i feel like one. To not be able to express, when I have tons of emotions to let out.
I am sad. Scared. And honestly... dying.
I have never been this scared. I wish I can turn back time. I wish life was as easy when I was young.
Living freely was my aim. And that's what I strived for, before.
Never thought that I made a decision that will forever change my life. And i am still in a stage to adapt but finding to a dark and blank point where I feel like giving up.
Life is hard. I find it hard to adjust me in my life now. Get it?
I know you don't.
But my heart ache... everytime I think what can I possibly do in order to get my life back.
My heart ache... everytime I think about the past more than I think about the future now.
My heart ache.. more than everything i could think of that can possibly hurt me.
My heart ache.. so bad.. I feel like crying.
I miss me, my vitamin S.
Write again soon, inshaAllah.
Syafika L.
